Getting what she needs

 My character (work-in-progress character, not me!) has to change from a sort of wild child/tomboy to a young Regency lady and I am pondering how best to do that.

I need to show her emotional and psychological changes and ensure the readers sees how she reacts differently to her new world.

Describing her thoughts could get boring unless I also manage to show how she sets about getting what she needs or wants. There should be a chain that connects how she begins to where she realises something she didn't know before or reaches a point where she does something she wouldn't have done before. If I can include some physical activity while she thinks, that would be good.

She should change in appearance as well as behaviour and I must remember it won’t happen overnight. She could be retrospective at one point, in which she would point up the change she is undergoing.

Her character's voice could be really strong in this sort of piece. If she does one thing and the reader would most likely choose another way of doing it, then Lizzy should begin to feel real to the reader

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To filter or not to filter?

 Have you heard of something called “filtering?”

I discovered a description of it this morning and laughed quietly to myself, for I have been trying to break the habit in my own writing for about a year now.

John Gardner describes “filtering” this way:

... the needless filtering of the image through some observing consciousness. The amateur writes: "Turning, she noticed two snakes fighting in among the rocks." Compare: "She turned. In among the rocks, two snakes were fighting ..." Generally speaking - though no laws are absolute in fiction - vividness urges that almost every occurrence of such phrases as "she noticed" and "she saw" be suppressed in favor of direct presentation of the thing see.

Janet Burroway explains: As a fiction-writer you will often be working through "some observing consciousness." Yet, when you step back and ask the readers to observe the observer - to look at rather than through the character - you start to tell-not-show, and rip us briefly out of the scene.

These days we are advised to Show, not Tell. So how we clear out the filters becomes important.  Having finally noticed this in re-editing my own books I am, to paraphrase Emma Darwin, at the point where “conscious craft has become intuitive craft.” 

The more straightforward, physical filter-words like "saw", "noticed", "looked round" "watched" "observed" are the first ones to look for, and then you can chase down phrases like "I remembered that", "she wondered if", "they decided that", "we considered whether" "he thought about", "He thought back to when", "to her it seemed as if" and if you think of more, follow them, too. You may be able to take out a great many of them and thus improve your writing. I know it improves mine!

What's the stake?

Identify the primary value at stake in a story.

It's a good phrase, but does it mean anything?

The protagonist usually represents the positive side of this value and the antagonist the negative side.

Now, can one have a heroine who is both protagonist and antagonist? Would that make life interesting? I think it happens often enough in real life. When there is a problem, then the heroine struggles to solve the problem. In my current work, honesty is at stake. If a successful outcome means she must lie, or do something dishonest, then the two sides of her nature will argue with each other - or against each other - in the story.

How successful will it be for the readers?

I suppose that will depend on how good the exposition is - facts, info about  the character that is necessary for the reader to understand her motivation, for her story and desperation to be understood. The skill is to make it invisible and usually  the dreaded words Show dont Tell creep in at this point. The author should dramatize the exposition if possible. Look at it this way - the charachter knows their world, their history and themselves  - or we hope they do.  Let them use what they know  to get what they want. Think of self-knowledge as a gun and let them shoot it out. Reveal your character slowly; let unimportant facts come first, the most critical facts last.

Notes to self on Show and Tell

Show and Tell.
Showing is walking in the footsteps of the heroine, seeing what she sees, etc etc.
But how far should this go?
I read quantities of books that don't particularly use show at all.
I keep getting comments that say I should show more. Is it some glib comment tossed around for the sake of something to say? Can a book be written in nothing else but show? Is it ever useful? Are there times when it is not useful? I decided to do some research and came up with this article first time of asking - 

https://jerryjenkins.com/show-dont-tell/

I don't know who  he is, but his explanation is good and clear, so I will keep it to refer to to when the clouds of confusion set in. 

This is what he says: 
When you tell rather than show, you simply inform your reader of information rather than allowing him to deduce anything.

You’re supplying information by simply stating it. You might report that a character is “tall,” or “angry,” or “cold,” or “tired.”

That’s telling.

Showing would paint a picture the reader could see in her mind’s eye.

If your character is tall, your reader can deduce that because you mention others looking up when they talk with him. Or he has to duck to get through a door. Or when posing for a photo, he has to bend his knees to keep his head in proximity of others.

Rather than telling that your character is angry, show it by describing his face flushing, his throat tightening, his voice rising, his slamming a fist on the table. When you show, you don’t have to tell.

Cold? Your character pulls her collar up, tightens her scarf, shoves her hands deep into her pockets, turns her face away from the biting wind.

Tired? He can yawn, groan, stretch. His eyes can look puffy. His shoulders could slump. Another character might say, “Didn’t you sleep last night? You look shot.”

When you show rather than tell, you make the reader part of the experience. Rather than having everything simply imparted to him, he sees it in his mind and comes to the conclusions you want.

What could be better than engaging your reader—giving him an active role in the storytelling—or should I say the story-showing?

Examples

Telling: When they embraced she could tell he had been smoking and was scared.

Showing: When she wrapped her arms around him, the sweet staleness of tobacco enveloped her, and he was shivering.

Telling: The temperature fell and the ice reflected the sun.

Showing: Bill’s nose burned in the frigid air, and he squinted against the sun

reflecting off the street.

Telling: Suzie was blind.

Showing: Suzie felt for the bench with a white cane.

Telling: It was late fall.

Showing: Leaves crunched beneath his feet.

Telling: She was a plumber and asked where the bathroom was.

Showing: She wore coveralls carried a plunger and metal toolbox, and wrenches of various sizes hung from a leather belt around her waist. “Point me to the head,” she said.

Telling: I had a great conversation with Tim over dinner and loved hearing his stories.

Showing: I barely touched my food, riveted by Tim. “Let me tell you another story,” he said.

Yes, it’s a mistake to take show, don’t tell as inviolable. While summary narrative is largely frowned upon, sometimes it’s a prudent choice. If there’s no value to the plot/tension/conflict/character arc by showing some mundane but necessary information, telling is preferable.

For instance, say you have to get your character to an important meeting and back, before the real action happens. Maybe he has to get clearance from his superiors before he can lead a secret raid.

Rather than investing several pages showing every aspect of the trip from packing, dressing, getting a cab to the airport, going through security, boarding the plane, arriving at his destination—you quickly tell that this way:

Three days later, after a trip to Washington to get the operation sanctioned by his superiors, Casey packed his weapons and camo clothes and set out to recruit his crew.

Then you immediately return to showing mode, describing his visits to trusted compatriots and getting them on board.